One thing I consistently hear from pedo-haters as a justification for their hatred and persecution of pedophiles, even non-offending pedophiles, is that children are basically innocent, by which they mean asexual. Ergo, any introduction to sex by an adult is inherently corrupting and destructive to their innocence. There are several problems with this line of reasoning, not least of which is that it implicitly conflates pedophilia with sexual abuse. But another problem with it is that it demonstrates a resounding ignorance of children themselves. For one thing, it fails to acknowledge children as individuals with their own set of interests and motivations. While all children begin as sexually naive, at some point most of them do begin to have some understanding of and even interest in sex, even if it is crude and often ill-informed. And many who have experienced it on some level, including masturbation, know it feels good. Children also fantasize about sex sometimes.
Over on Studio@Gawker, Stephanie Georgopulos, in conjunction with Comedy Central’s new show Not Safe with Nikki Glaser, just put out an article called Stuffed Animals, Cult Leaders, and the Mailman: Yes, Women Have Fantasies, Too, and I think it’s an important piece. It highlights not only women’s sexual fantasies but young girls’ as well. Here are some examples:
“My first fantasy was about being tied up. It was when I saw Peter Pan, the animated version, and they tied Wendy onto the pirate ship and she was trying to get free. I remember thinking that was really hot. Like during recess at school, I wanted to play ‘get tied up.’ That was so exciting to me.” — Jess, 30
“I was best friends with this guy in third grade, and I didn’t even know what sex was yet, but he gave me his school portrait and I put it on my pillow and humped a stuffed animal (the original sex toy). My fantasy was, I was laying on this bean bag we had in our classroom, and he tripped and fell on top of me, and then we rubbed our bodies together. I didn’t even know what penetration was, but I knew that whatever turned me on involved two bodies rubbing on each other.” — Amy, 28
There you have it—children have sexual fantasies too. I myself had a fantasy around age ten of being forcefully stripped by an adult or another child. I even had dreams about it, and when I would wake up just before being stripped, I often felt disappointed. These dreams were likely inspired by a scene from The Dark Crystal where the Skeksis Chamberlain was forcefully stripped out of his robes, and I remember playacting this scene once with a cousin (though not to the point where I was stripped completely).
Don’t get me wrong: the takeaway from this shouldn’t be that I think children are raging little horndogs who are ready to get it on, or that adults engaging children sexually should be seen as okay. My reason for bringing it up is a little more oblique: to point out how wrong most people are with respect to these issues in general. You see, the pro-contacters understand these things better than the average Joe does, and that is a massive problem, because young pedophiles who find themselves on a board like Girl Chat or Boy Chat can be easily confused by the essential truthfulness underscoring much of the pro-contact agenda, especially in light of how far out in left field the rest of society tends to be on this stuff. There is a point at which the pro-contact viewpoint slips into pure speculation and ultimately wishful thinking, but the transition is more subtle than you may think, and if society is going to have any chance of winning over young, impressionable pedophiles to right-thinking in the face of that seductive pro-contact bias, then it needs to be more honest about these issues.
Moreover, this mistaken view about children as perfectly asexual little angels actually makes them more vulnerable to sexual abuse. Consider: a child who masturbates meets a molester who points out to the child how good it feels to stimulate the genitalia. The child may already know this, but they also know that most adults, including their parents, think they don’t do such things, or even know about them. Who do you think the child is more likely to trust on sexual matters, the adult who tells the child what they already know, or the adult who is in utter denial about these things?
Think about it.